Swallow Hard, Vote Trump

Down the street from us lives a U.S. Congressman who delivers church sermons on the weekends, has an MBA, and loves his fellow veterans. I wish he was running for President.

But he’s not. And that’s why I’m voting for Trump.

Before all my liberal amigos out there get their panties in a bunch diving for the ‘unfollow’ button, let’s be clear. I don’t like the man. I pray for him. God loves him. But man, he’s a special pill to swallow.

I’ve said it a hundred times, but there’s no better summary than this: we are voting for policy, not a person. This is not a personality contest. It’s a choice between two people who have the power-albeit more limited than most realize- to shape our nation and the world we leave our kids. We aren’t electing a pastor. Or our company CEO.  Or our school board leader.

We’re electing a person who will protect and propel our religious rights… our jobs… our kids.

I don’t care if the core of Trump’s heart is as murky as oil spill, I love what he stands for, and what he does.  And there is no doubt God’s using him. Through the Trump presidency I’ve found it helpful reflecting on the Biblical story of Balaam’s donkey. God gave him the power to speak human words and the wisdom to listen to an angel when his owner couldn’t recognize the danger.  With the risk of sounding callous….if God can use a donkey, he can use Trump.

Most can at least agree God has especially blessed and protected America since its inception. We’re one of the last true democracies, the greatest protector of nations, and the world’s most generous country, and he’s using Trump to preserve it.

But really, isn’t that how God so often works? I’ve always found he has a sense of humor, and rarely delivers answers in the exact way we expect…like combating my reckless ways by uniting me in marriage with a lifelong Boys Scout who’d rather lose a toe than illegally park.

For any democrat staring at the Biden-Harris ticket with as much enthusiasm as a Monday morning budget meeting, or any Christian still hiding in the shadow of Trump’s hair scared to voice their support, I truly get the quandary. Here’s my best summation of reasons to cringe at the thought of riding the Trump train, simply to assure I’m not a lobotomized Kool Aide drinker votin’ the party line.

He’s a butt grabber. He’s been known to grab an arse or two through the trajectory of his colored life, and the man switches wives quicker than Pelosi swaps injection sites.  Not excusing or condoning any womanizing behavior (ever) but… the man owned the Miss Universe Organization, people. He’s as shallow as the sun is bright. Which is why we’re not marrying him, nor electing him the Ladies Benevolent Society chair. We’re voting him back into the Oval Office, far far away from our mutually safe heinies.

He’s a narcissist. Like he probably has a social disorder. But I’ve developed a theory through the years, mostly fueled by late night pinot and copious amount political news. I believe Trump has somehow morphed his own identity with that of America, hence transferring his self-obsession to that of his country. Like when he looks in the mirror he sees the flag or something, I dunno.  What I do know is clearly, the man loves America, and works day and night, without a paycheck, taking a 24/7 beating from our joke of a press corps, while upholding every single belief and value we hold dear. I swear he must regenerate energy in that tanning bed. Again, it doesn’t matter how or why he does it. He can walk down the streets with hair and ego as high as high as the Ozarks, as long as he continues to enact moves like his recent executive order to combat human trafficking….with an extra $4 million toward prosecuting offenders.

He lacks self-control. If I’ve learned nothing but two truths in 2020 it’s been this: Homeschooling your quarantined children may drive the best of us to strong drink. And second, Trump’s PR people surely deserve meds. I mean, can you IMAGINE being Trump’s speech writers?! Picture these ivy leaguers schlepping through research and analytics day and night, only to have Trump go completely AWOL and speak off the cuff and say the word “fantastic” 24 times at every podium appearance? I honestly believe every time his thumb takes to Twitter a white hair appears on a staffer’s head. Every time.  

I only present this list of seeming criticisms to at least sway the hearts and minds of anyone on the fence. I get it. The man can be harder to stomach than my grandma’s liver pie.  But I say hold our noses, swallow hard, and vote based on what the man has done and continues to do. Here are a few:

He’ll continue to fighting to preserve the lives of the unborn

He’ll continue to protect our religious freedom

He’ll fight socialism, reliance on government … basically make sure we don’t wake up as Canadians

He’ll continue to protect our borders and sustain safe and legal immigration policies

He’ll continue to protect the Nation of Israel, and continue building global peace, recently acknowledged by the Nobel Peace Prize committee for Trump’s work forging a historic peace deal between Serbia and Kosovo.

He’ll continue to honor and improve the quality of life for America’s  veteran community

He’ll continue to aid and support the black community

Honestly, he’s done and continues to do such an amazing job, I’m almost okay if he kicks a baby or two along the way. Just kidding liberals. Save the Kleenex…and a tree.

The good and unbiased news is that no matter what happens after Nov. 3, God is in control. I won’t be weeping in the streets, searching for my digital pacifier on Facebook peaking through my blinds for signs of the end times. Thankfully, our hope, peace and security will never stem from political authorities or government rule.

I strongly believe Trump will see another four years, but if Biden gets in, we’ll survive. Maybe take a vacay or two to our nearest sanctuary city. I hear they have great food there.


Posted in



  1. sherri Havell on October 13, 2020 at 1:19 pm

    well written! Loved it

  2. Donna Salinardi on October 13, 2020 at 2:51 pm

    I absolutely love your candid analysis!
    I totally agree!

    • Tanya on October 13, 2020 at 5:25 pm

      This was great Jess! So true

  3. Katrina Pitt on October 14, 2020 at 12:58 am

    Excellent article! Well done, great perspective!

Leave a Comment