How many of us would nearly kill to go back in time and warn—or inform—our younger selves about the things we wish we knew before hitting our thirties and forties?
I know I would’ve avoided so many relationship heartaches if I had even known what attachment theory was. If I had, I would have realized I was chronically co-dependent and in desperate need of healing from insecure attachment issues.
I would’ve saved myself a mountain of mom guilt and regret if I had focused on my kids more after divorce instead of serial dating my way out of loneliness. I would have had way more tolerance and empathy for others—and a much more open mind—if I had been less “religious” and more loving.
What about you?
Maybe it’s just my Gen X-slanted algorithm, but I keep hearing that our forties are the best decade of life. It for sure sucks when your butt starts to sag and the night sweats creep in, but at this point, we actually know and love who we are. We’re not falling for Ken’s tired pickup lines as easily as we used to (unless he’s 6’5” … working on that one!). It’s tempting to continually look back and feel bad about the past, especially If you’ve been through a divorce.
After the death of a marriage, it’s easy to feel like we gave away so much of ourselves—sometimes even our “best” years—with nothing to show for it. But what if surviving, and now learning to thrive on our own, has actually etched us into a more centered and enlightened version of ourselves?
I want to take all the pain, heartache, mistakes, and flaws I’ve faced head-on and use them as fuel to grow and flourish in the decades ahead. Because our failures and mistakes don’t define us. They refine us.
In our most recent episode, Jess and I share the major life lessons and soul evolutions we’ve made since our twenties. And dang, there are some doozies. But instead of cringing or drowning in regret over how life could’ve been if only we had known then what we know now, we’re choosing to focus on how empowered—and hopefully (Lord Jesus, please!) smoother—life will be moving forward now that we’re clearer-minded, rightly prioritized, and more healed.
Cheers to rising above and looking forward. The best is yet to come. ✨
Join us for the full convo on the Free Failing Podcast—available on Apple, Spotify, or YouTube. Our comments are always open, and we’d love to hear the biggest life lesson you’ve learned along the way!
